Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Will I ever conceive??????

So my husband and I have been together for over 10yrs now and married for almost 7 months, and we have always had unprotected sex (I don't condone unprotected sex).  Okay, I won't say that we have always had unprotected sex, maybe it's been protected like 10 times, I don't know.  But yeah, I'm starting to feel like we're never ever going to be able to conceive.  It sucks feeling this way. 
Everyone ask, "When are you guys going to have kids?".  Well, if we knew we would tell you.  But that question makes me so sad that I can't answer it.  We're in no rush but it would be nice.  The good thing about not having kids right now is that we pretty much don't have to worry about diapers, bottles, baby clothes, sleepless nights , babysitters, etc, but I mean what woman doesn't want a child?  You may say you don't ever want to have kids but next thing you know you're pregnant. Maybe I should say that and that miracle will happen. 

My two sisters are completely fertile.  The oldest one has three kids and my younger sister has two.  Are we doing it wrong or what? lol...  I have a cousin who has been telling me the best way to do it, to put a pillow on my back.  I've tried it all really.

You say, "Why don't you just go check yourselves out?".  Well, to tell you the truth, I'm scared.  I'm scared of them telling us that we're going to need test or use fertility crap that cost hundreds of dollars and what not, or for them to say that I can never have children.  That scares me.  Plus, some us cannot afford insurance.

Adoption?  That's something we have thought about because yes I know there are a lot of kids all over the world that need homes.  The problem is, money.  It's really expensive and the situation we are in at the moment would make that impossible.  But adoption will always be there.  

My sister Jessika told me that she would have a child for me.  If it's a girl, she would be all mine, but if it's a boy, the boy stays with her. lol.  That would be nice.  But I'm pretty sure it would be hard on her part. 

Any who, I want to have kids and my biological clock is ticking and I'm getting older by the minute.  Trying to get pregnant is the fun part but finding out that you're not pregnant  month to month is the frustrating part.

This may not make any sense at all, but I just had to let some of this out. 

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